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March 14, 2014


I used to be one of those who found pleasure in flirting with the opposite sex. It gave me a ‘high’ and boosted my confidence or so I thought. Being in a steady relationship at the time didn’t stop me. When the pang of guilt came calling, I’d quickly brush it aside with my favourite statement ‘what could be wrong with flirting? After all, it’s harmless. Not like I’m cheating’…

Well, I’ve come to realise the dangers of flirting with the opposite sex when in a steady relationship. Nothing cute about it. If you feel the need to be admired or chased at all times then you might want to deal with your self-esteem issues. It took some growing up on my part to realise that flirting is very disrespectful to one’s self and to one’s partner. You might see it as ‘playful’ but you end up giving the wrong impression to the person you’re flirting with. They’ll go away thinking ‘if only the environment was right, I’d definitely have scored that one’. Wasn’t what you were going for was it?

Mind you, not all of us know where to draw the line when it comes to flirting. For those who would dare to admit, it sometimes leads to infidelity. Better to just avoid it totally. Like a local adage would say ‘na from clap dance dey enter’. If you are at a party and you flirt with random dudes/babes, it’s quite unlikely you guys might hook up but flirting with your co-worker could spell doom if you don’t set boundaries. From casual flirting, you could be giving off sexual signals even without physical contact and that’s where the danger lies. Admiring a member of the opposite sex or paying compliments to them isn’t wrong, no. My worry really is ‘how far is too far’? What if the other party wants to take it a little bit further.

For the single ones out there, flirting isn’t so much of a taboo. It just shows some form of attraction between a man and a woman, that’s if you don’t get too carried away and keep things within the boundaries of decency. After all, most relationships actually begin from mutual admiration. You need to fancy someone to a degree before you take the step to explore things further but you still need to set clear boundaries ‘before handshake go pass elbow’….lol

To people in steady relationships, please resist the urge to flirt with the opposite sex especially in the presence of your partner. It gives room for jealousy and creates insecurity. Not fair on your spouse at all when they keep wondering if they’re good enough, pretty enough or tall enough for you. As a mark of respect to your partner, set boundaries with people of the opposite sex to avoid any misconception. If you think flirting is harmless when you’re in a relationship, please answer this…’Would you also be happy with your partner flirting?’ I guess not.

Have a wonderful weekend… *hugs*

From → Lifestyle

One Comment
  1. Anonymous permalink

    Well spoken, BATEL.

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